6 OVERRIDE! Reminders for the Times We Live In

There are many distractions. Change can start in simple and subtle ways.

There’s no way I could have predicted the future, or what the state of the world would be right now when I wrote OVERRIDE! What if there was another way?. I wrote it to be timeless. As I was writing it I noticed how variations on the themes kept emerging. Editing this book could have gone on forever, but instead, I wanted to present ideas that could be explored well beyond the pages of the book.

It’s really easy to be distracted and lose focus in the times we live in (turns out distraction and chaos is a real tactic in authoritarian rule), but in order to OVERRIDE what’s no longer working, we’re going to have to be intentional about our actions. (Remember, OVERRIDE requires new action so we don’t keep repeating what’s not working.)

OVERRIDE! was written with the intention where you could open to any page on any day to have the reminder that you need. I’ve pulled out six reminders from the pages of the book to serve as for the times. I know there are countless perspectives related to these themes to learn from others. My perspective is one side, which is always evolving.

1. ASK MORE QUESTIONS.

(Page 113)

Stop making assumptions. Question everything. Ask questions. And more questions. Start valuing questions over answers. Be OK not having answers, questions can still be progress.

2. LISTEN. REALLY LISTEN.

(Page 115)

Listening is one of the most undervalued skills out there. We put pressure on having answers, and we get too stuck in our own response that we forget to actually listen. We need to listen to the voices of others (without judgment). Even if we don’t agree with someone we still have something we can learn from, or it may shift how we respond. (We must get outside of our [naive] bubbles to understand the world and make real change!) Listening lends itself to remind us to PAY ATTENTION.

3. DEFINE TERMS.

(Page 169)

We may think we’re speaking the same language or about the same subject as someone else, but often there’s something “lost in translation.” We may feel shame if we don’t know what something actually means (or take the time to look it up). It never hurts to take a few extra moments to define a term. Even if it’s in everyday language, defining terms can help insure we’re all talking about the same thing.

4. THE POWER OF THE COLLECTIVE.

(Page 54)

Together we are powerful. We are most powerful when we focus on ourselves and the part we play. We can’t change others, but we can help model how we want to show up in the world. The collective has the power to spread like a virus for good. Let’s come up with small ways where our actions can inspire others to do their own part.

5. CONNECT WITH OTHERS.

(Page 193)

We need connection. We’re not designed to do life alone. When we connect with others we soon can see that we’re not the only one who feels this way (and that there is indeed ANOTHER WAY). Not everyone has to become your new BFF, we all can play different roles. Keep in mind when you start overriding ways that no longer serve you (or society), not everyone in your life will understand at first. This is where community is key. We can inspire each other to keep going.

6. WHAT LEADERSHIP LOOKS LIKE.

(Page 78)

What is leadership? What does it mean to lead? What qualities do the best leaders possess? How do they communicate? Are they looking beyond their own personal interests? Are they the loudest in the room? Do leaders look the same way today as you saw them when you were growing up?

I’m curious what reminders have been helpful for you—from the book, or otherwise—in these times.

I’ve come to see a lot of mainstream media can miss the mark of how we present information. Here are some of the voices I’m turning to for information and expanding my world view:

• Tressie McMillan Cottom — writer, sociologist, and professor (see this clip on “The Daily Show”, and more of her writing for The New York Times)

• Matt Bernstein is a queer culture reporter with his own platform, known as @mattxiv on Instagram (incredibly informative), and hosts a very informative podcast, A Bit Fruity . (Don’t be fooled by the fancy nails, or handstands. He is is a force to be recokoned with and is self-financed on Patreon.)

• Robert Reich
  is a former Secretary of Labor who uses his online platforms including to explore (and expose) where power lies (@rbreich on Instagram and Substack)

• Sharon McMahon
  – breaks down government through her Substack
  The Preamble
  so you can understand it (She goes by @sharonsaysso on Instgram and has written a book, The Small and Mighty)

• Heather Cox Richardson
  — is an American historian writing “Letters from an American” on Substack

• Taylor Lorenz
  is a culture and tech reporter who has recently started her own publication
  User Mag
  on Substack to bypass gatekeeping and report honestly. (You can often hear her on A Bit Fruity with Matt Bernstein.)

• Courier Newsroom

• Teen Vogue

• Rolling Stone

Please amplify other voices for these times in the comments of this post.

Get your own copy of OVERRIDE! What if there was another way? A pocket playbook for possibility at override-book.com.